turning_40

Something awesome happens when you turn 40.

 

Sure does, but it’s a bit like when you are expecting a baby. Before the baby arrives, you think you know how it’s going to be and people will try to explain how it’s going to feel and be, but it’s not until the baby actually arrives that BOOM!, the experience happens. Let’s face it, it is sooooooo not what you thought it was going to be. It’s better.

 

Yeah, skin starts to lose its elasticity, your boobs start to drop and a few rogue wiry hairs appear in the strangest places. But there are some of the most awesome things that happen too!  So here are 18 awesome things that happen after you turn 40 that are to be embraced and celebrated!

 

1      You trust your gut instinct.

Oh yes, something will be said or will happen and your spidey senses are triggered immediately. Many times in my life I have ignored these feelings of ‘something is not quite right’ and BOY have I learnt many a lesson from those times. You hit 40 and all of a sudden you just say ‘no’ to anything you don’t like the feel of. When negative spidey senses are triggered…they are no longer ignored. They are respected, trusted and acted upon. You must listen and trust they are right. They are saying “ Whoa there girlfriend, we’ve been here before and we know what you should do”.

 

2      You find your childish sense of humour again.

Now my nephews and children will tell you that I have always had the propensity to be embarassing in public. But I turned 40 and stopped caring about what people think. If I want to ‘gallop’ Miranda style across a car park, then I will. If I want to dance in the supermarket when a song I like comes on…then I will and God help anyone who wants to stop me getting on Jacks scooter to scoot home after he has scooted up to school! I love to laugh and enjoy being ‘silly’ again, it makes me smile, it makes others smile and it’s just fun.  Go on give it a go!

 

3      You drop the negative and toxic people in your life.

Surround yourself with friends and acquaintances who light up with a shared excitement when you tell them of your dreams and ambitions. Keep the ones you laugh and love with. Ditch those who sap you of energy and leave you feeling down and drained. You don’t have to be mean, make a dramatic exit from a relationship or just write people off but you can control how much time you spend with people who deflate you. You won’t regret it

 

4      You realise your time is now, so enjoy it!

We spend decades preparing for our futures. Getting qualified, climbing the corporate ladder, everything is focused on the future. You turn 40 and suddenly you realise that “hey wait a minute, I’m here!” .Time to wake up and smell the coffee. Burn the candles, wear the shoes and always wear your best posh pants!

 

5      You really like who you have become.

You know yourself better than ever and you like who you are. You’re comfortable in your skin, you’ve gained experience and lived a little. Confidence is abundant and you are not afraid to give something new a try. You’ve spent time with yourself and hey, you are cool company to be with.

 

6      You don’t need alcohol to have a good time.

Ok, OK so this might feel a little controversial, but it’s true. You CAN go to parties and not drink, dance on the tables and still have a good time. Not drinking gives you more time at the weekend to be doing other things. Rather than nursing a hangover you are up and out and doing stuff far more exciting. Once you realise you don’t need to drink to have fun, you are more comfortable with saying no to the booze and hello to a longer more fulfilling weekend!

 

7      It gets easier to say no.

We get more confident with saying no. It’s great! Really. If you don’t want to do something, you can just say no. No more worrying about being a people pleaser and trying to take everything on board. The real shocker is…people are usually OK with a ‘no, I’m afraid I can’t do that’. Wonderful.

 

8      What you see in the mirror doesn’t dictate how you feel.

Come on. How many of you have looked in the mirror and thought to yourself “when the bloody hell did that happen?”. It’s amazing how you can look one day and suddenly see the lines around your eyes, the liver spots on your hands or the loser skin around your neck. It’s not the end of the world – you are aging and that is OK, but you still feel somewhere in your twenties. Well congratulations, you are the same only wiser, more experienced and probably more fun than you were in your twenties! Age is a mindset. I choose to remain young!

 

9      You have more respect for yourself.

Your ‘spidey’ senses become honed after 40. It’s not so much about you having respect for yourself as more you can totally recognise when someone is being disrespectful to you. Newsflash – after 40 you realise you don’t have to put up with that s*@t. Don’t be in company that is not respectful of your basic needs as a human being. You’re too busy, got too much to do to waste your time in that kind of environment. Move on.

 

10     You’re not a slave to fashion, you wear what is best for you.

One of the funniest things I found myself saying was how “M&S have really upped their game and are far more fashionable these days. They have some really great stuff in store”. The silence hung in the air as I realised I have just moved into their target market!  There comes a point where you just avoid high fashion as it just isn’t for you. You have found what suits you best and that is what you are sticking with…wear it with confidence and you’ll feel fabulous!

 

11     You rediscover a sport you loved as a child.

I love to swim. I loved to swim as a child. I swim train with a club now and I LOVE it. Gone are the days of going to the gym and thumping the treadmill because that is what we are supposed to do, right? I rediscovered my love of swimming training and swimming competitively at 43 and I thrive on the challenges it brings and the comfort zones I push myself through. How about you?  What sport did you love as a child? What could you be doing now? Football, netball, hockey? They’ll be a team and club near you…check it out now!

 

12     You learn to ‘Let it go’…

Unless you’ve been under a huge rock since 2013 you will have heard of the song ‘Let it go’ featured in the hit Disney movie Frozen. It becomes a bit of a mantra after you hit 40. In the past there may have been happenings or conversations that have just made your blood boil. After you turn 40 you start to consider if the anger and hurt you feel over something is actually worth it. Really. Most of the time it’s not. If there is nothing you can do about it then just ‘let it go’ and move on. Intake of breath, extract any lessons to be learned from it all and then move on.

 

13      There is always a positive.

Look for them. They are there in any situation, sometimes they are incredibly hard to find but they are there none the less. ALWAYS. Find them.

 

14      You appreciate time more.

I swear I blinked on my 30th birthday and 15 years flew by!  Now over 40,  I realise that time really goes by at a spritly pace. So how I choose to spend that time has now changed. I get up earlier in the mornings and go be bed when I am tired. I have more experience in life and now understand that if I want to be doing something… I need to be getting on with it… NOW. I plan my time more and get the most from it and the bi-product is that you also become more present in what you are doing at the time you are doing it. Far more fun! Becoming fully aware of time and that it’s our choice as to how we use it is incredibly empowering.

 

15      Do it or don’t, but decide!

I love this one. If you find yourself deliberating over a decision,  make it black and white. I have saved sooooooo much time in my 40s so far not deliberating over stuff that just doesn’t matter. If you want to do something, do it. If you don’t want to do something, don’t do it, but just decide. It all works out, once you make the decision.

 

16     Turning 50 doesn’t seem so bad!

I can hear some of you screaming “WTF, is she mad?”. I cried on the morning of my 40th. To be honest I’m not sure if it was because I was relieved to have reached it or because I was mourning my youth. I am pretty sure I am not going to be doing the same on my 50th. We have a choice, worry about it or embrace it. My mid 50s are going to be exciting times for me, the children will be grown up and my hubby and I are planning to do some serious travelling and ‘behaving badly’!  It will be a time of change for us. We visualise it being exciting times. That is far more fun.

 

17     You understand the power of great underwear!

Wearing great underwear just makes you feel good about yourself. It’s a sign of good self-care, that you matter, that it’s mainly for you and that you deserve the little details to be perfect for you. So whatever kind of ‘posh pants’ you love…wear them. 😉

 

18     You get better at learning to relax.

Maybe we get to a point in our forties, where we NEED to relax more. Decades of getting stressed out take their toll and you really need to find better and more frequent ways to ‘chill out’. Since turning 40, never before have I loved so much to be out in the open fresh air, be amongst the trees in the forest, with the sand between my toes on the beach or diving into the cool water of a swimming pool, curled up in a chair with a good book or sinking into a hot bath up to my nose. We learn to find the ‘treats’ of being able to relax and we make more time to be doing them

 

So there you have it, those are my favourite things about being in my mid-life so far.

 

How about you?

I’d love to hear from you, please drop me a comment below, what do you love the most about this time in your life?

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